Not sure where to start.
It hurts me to watch a brother slowly killing himself with poison.
A smart and creative friend walking on a dead end, believing that it
could lead to anything other than a life of poverty,
sickness and mental anguish. In other words: HELL.

Everyone has a quota.

Each one of your friends, family members and coworkers.
No one around you is safe from this number.
It dictates how much time you can spend with, or talk,
to a specific person, before feeling the need to retreat.

If it’s low, it means you can tolerate this person’s
presence for a very limited amount of time.
The TQ is calculate in minutes.

Simply put, it’s the number of consecutive minutes you can be with someone.
An annoying coworker, for example, might have a TQ of 5 or 6. It only takes 5 or 6 minutes for you to plan your exit after they started opening their mouth and you are locked in.

There are negative extremes, like the boss whose IQ is lower than a typical German Shepherd’s, the asshole who talks down to you and your colleagues, is closed to new ideas and projects his personal frustrations and insecurities onto the whole team.
This unusual case would have a TQ of less than 1. A person you can only tolerate for 59 seconds or less.  Thankfully, these parasites are pretty rare. In my limited experience, after spending two decades in the workforce, they usually represented only 1 or 2 out of every hundred co-workers I have ever encountered.

Then there are other relationships where a friend or close one might be someone you truly love. But there are limits to how long you can spend with them before starting to feel like pulling away. It could be caused by their negative attitude toward life or addiction to gossip. Or simply because they rarely have anything deep or interesting to say. Sometimes it’s nothing more than a personality mismatch.

For example if you tend to be quiet and introspective, and a friend is often loud and obnoxious. Or vice versa. These people fit in the average TQ range. Usually around 200. You can technically spend 200 minutes with them, but it starts getting painful at the 3 hr mark…

We all have some friends or family members with whom we could talk to for hours, or even go on vacation with and still feel in harmony. Then feel like doing it all over again. Those are positive relationships. The high TQ relationships. The 1k club. The rare gems that you must cherish, love and appreciate. They empower you, and you empower them.
You could easily spend 1000 minutes in their company (about 16 hours), or a full day from morning to night. No matter how happy and positive you are, I’m pretty sure you’ll agree that this type doesn’t represent the majority of people around you. I said it earlier,
but it must be repeated- They are precious, and we must be grateful for having them in our lives.

If you want your life to be a happy and productive one, you need to give time and energy to the people who deserve it. And limit the time spent with the other, less deserving types. The very low TQ relationships must be eliminated from your life,
cut out as precisely as a surgeon would remove a malignant tumour.

It’s not always easy. These people know you well, and very often, they know your weaknesses. So they will resist your attempt at pulling away from them. No matter how much they try to twist reality and manipulate you into feeling guilty or like a bad person during this surgery, keep in mind that this is like a vampire shrieking while a wooden stake is being pushed into his heart. Once the noise is gone, life will quiet down and
you’ll be able to enjoy newfound freedom.

Be grateful and happy that most people are good, but be aware of the parasites.
Recognize and eliminate them from your life as early as possible, before they can
cause damage to your health, career, relationships and life.

One last thing—- This isn’t a way to feel superior to others, or bring them down. It’s nothing more than a scale to measure the optimal amount of time and energy you can healthily share with different people. Keep in mind that many, if not most of the people you can’t stand, probably feel the same way about you. But humans often get stuck in bad habits and prefer the comfort of routine than the chaos of change.

That’s why you must be strong enough to initiate the change, and give your relationships a good spring cleaning once in a while.

Preferably once a year.

Writing is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but the only thing I absolutely want to
master. No matter how long it takes.

Life seems to play tricks on us at the most unexpected times.

Nearly three weeks ago I experienced the most significant loss
of my life when my baby Joon went to heaven.
Not long after, I lost Puma…

When I was finally able to function again, I went right back to my 90-day challenge.
Becoming a better, more productive human being is the most important goal of all at the moment.
One that will allow me to experience life in a new and exciting way.
Striving for this goal will bring every aspect of my life to a new level;
Relationships, business, writing, fitness, power,
love, communications, social status, etc…

After a year of intense changes, struggles and losses, and just a little
over one month of consistent efforts, some powerful rays are piercing
through the clouds. During my last FBA meetup, I met some amazing guys
that will not only help make my journey smoother, but they’re also
people I enjoy hanging out.
Who knows where these new friendships will lead!
New doors are being opened for me, new dimensions.
Efforts are starting to pay off, and I’m only getting started!

Another powerful ray of sunshine came in the form of an extraordinary woman.
I’m feeling things that I’ve never felt before. She sent me the first message last Thursday. It didn’t contain anything out of the ordinary, but as soon as I opened it, I felt as if
she was already in my life and merely messaging me to say hello.
Like I had known her for an entire lifetime.

With each message, the feeling got stronger and stronger,
until I couldn’t resist anymore and had to call her. As soon as we spoke,
the atmosphere became almost overwhelming.
At that moment a thought came to mind.
One that freaked me out a little.
Four words that have never, ever crossed
my mind in that particular order; She is my soulmate.

It sounds crazy as fuck just to type and read this right now, but it’s such a powerful
feeling that denying or avoiding to say or think it would be childish.

We spoke for a total of 3 hours so far, and every minute of it made me smile.
I’m really looking forward to meeting this woman face to face, another feeling I’ve never had. There are no feelings of nervousness, doubts, or any other type of negative thoughts coming to the surface…

She’s confident, funny, charming, classy and sweet. If any of my friends spoke this way about a woman they had just met, I would probably dismiss it as being immature or overly optimistic. But this is different. I KNOW that her presence will bring full of  positive emotions into my life, and that my presence will bring her happiness as well.
I feel that we both need the same things from a partner, and desire the same things
out of life.

This is the universe showing me that my efforts are being rewarded, and continuing
to live this way will revolutionize every single aspect of my life. Soon, my reality will be
a reflection of the magical, limitless life I was visualizing in my twenties…

The universal harvest is like other crops in nature, the harvest only comes after sowing the seeds, nurturing them and being patient. The main difference is that harvesting
the life of your dreams takes much longer than corn or wheat. Especially if your
goals and desires are out of the ordinary. It could take years, even decades for
the life of your dreams to materialize. The only condition is to never give
up, and keep working at it while maintaining a positive mindset.

Keep nurturing those seeds no matter how many seasons pass, there will be
scary storms, droughts, maybe even a tornado or two… But one day,
when you’ve finally become the person you had to become,
the fruits of your labour will sprout.

Sometimes the universe gives you a friendly nudge.
Usually, it happens near the point of exhaustion.
Then, out of nowhere, the clouds open up,
and the sun shines through.
Illuminating the dark path which was making your life
harder than it should be.

I love those moments.
They seem to be timed purposely to feel like a spiritual nudge.
During those dark times when it feels like life is testing you,
after getting a few cosmic slaps. A push of positivity from the universe,
or the hand of God tapping you on the shoulder.
Depending on how you choose to look at it.

Either way, it’s a sign that you’re on the right path, and things will only get better from here. It’s a glimpse into a potential future that’s waiting for you, IF, you steadily keep working toward your goals and have the self-discipline to make measurable efforts every single day.

As I’ve shared before. This year has not been an easy one. It was the year when I officially unplugged myself from the matrix. I left my very comfortable, stable job. Which was also very well paid, compared to the average salary. I could work from home, had full benefits, over a month
paid vacation each year, etc…

I left it to start a business with a childhood friend.
And it didn’t work out as we had planned.
It lasted nearly a year, during that year I accumulated more debt than I thought was possible. And it grew exponentially since the paychecks
were occasional and measly.

After much soul searching, I realized that I hated what I was doing, and had to leave if I wanted to preserve my healthy mind and body. I exited the business very quickly, damaging an old friendship in the process.

During that year I lost another close friend, a best friend, to crack.
He’s alive physically, but my friend is gone. The drug took over his soul and mind, like an insidious parasite. I still have hope that he’ll be back, but there have been so many false hopes that it’s weaker than ever.

The nail in the coffin for me was suddenly losing my boy Peppy.
My sweet, beautiful and loving 9-year-old Ridgeback.
A dog that I loved more than some people love their kids.
The emotional pain that I felt during that week beat all my previous records. Less than 10 days later, Puma, my 17yr old Tonkinese cat also died. This was the cherry on top…

I still kept my head up. Once I was able to function normally, eat and sleep regularly, at reasonable times. I got back to my 90-day challenge. It was dark, but I stuck with it. Slowly at first, I’m still not back to
full momentum, but getting there.

I write every day. The same goes for physical training, learning Instagram,
and doing at least one small task each day to get closer to
all my FBA and lifestyle goals.

I’m glad to say that after much effort, and a few close encounters with negative thinking, I received a little one of those unicorn nudges.
My aunt, who is a fantastic artist, offered to help with the sketches I’ll be sending to China. I accepted, never imagining how precious her help would become. Now I see that her skills allow me to communicate my needs with suppliers in a way that’s even better than if I could speak Chinese.

If you want to eliminate any type of misunderstanding or cultural barrier and communicate surgically precise information, what could be better than a DRAWING? Who is my aunt’s specialty, she’s a master!
Right off the bat, I have a unique competitive advantage over 95% of
new or aspiring sellers out there. I have other tricks up my sleeve as well, but this was a real unexpected gift!

While we discussed what I wanted to create, she was creating the first draft- live! Something I didn’t expect. And it blew my mind!
It was so precise, it managed to help me figure out some details that I wasn’t even able to imagine. This is the exact moment when I first felt the hand of God. A helping hand, in time of need. As I was leaving, my aunt casually asked if I was ok with her friend looking over the design, since she’s a professional patternmaker who has the mind of an engineer…

Holy shit. If my aunt’s offer to help was the hand of God, her friend looking over our plans and giving me feedback THE VERY NEXT DAY was like a hug from God. Now I feel even better about the direction I chose.
Those cosmic confirmations just warmed my heart and made me smile at a time when I desperately needed it.

Today my mind is having trouble with positivity, random thoughts are
darkening my spirit. Still feeling waves of sadness flowing through me.

Two weeks ago I lost my baby Joon to a horrific disease called
hemangiosarcoma. My 9year old ridgeback pup, my son, my best
friend. The sweet soul who had been by my side since my
early thirties. Through good and bad, He was always
there to cheer me up. I miss him so much.

This week I also lost Puma, my 17-year-old Tonkinese cat.
A loving cat that I adopted when I was 24. He had a tumour
in his stomach and was losing weight by the day,
in the end, he was only skin and bones.

So two pet burials in two weeks.
I’ve been positive for the longest time,
but in the past few months,
there have been too many losses.

It started in May with the loss of my business.
Along with that business, I also lost one of my closest friends,
who was also my business partner.

During that time I lost another one of my best friends to crack.
He’s physically alive, but not the same person he used to be.
His mind and soul have been consumed by a deadly poison.
I hope he comes back one day.
But for now- my friend is gone.

Every day I see Parkinson’s disease slowly chipping away at my father’s well-being. Today he had trouble bringing the fork to his mouth during lunch…
I had no idea what to do. I didn’t offer to help, it might have made him feel helpless.
But not helping made me feel like an ass.

By now, summer 2018, I was expecting to be financially able to help him live a more comfortable life. Delicious and healthy meals, prepared daily by a personal chef.
Regular massage therapy, private yoga courses, a housekeeper…
All those things need to be postponed until next year.
Poor daddy, I wish I could do more to help right now.

This veil of darkness all around me has been lingering for almost a year now.
I’m getting fucking tired. But will never give up. I’m only getting stronger.
This struggle is getting me ready for the big league.

Other than my hopes and dreams, there’s no concrete way for me to say
how I’ll be paying my mortgage or dozens of other mandatory payments after
the next three months…. But I have absolute faith that everything will be ok.

Since I’m exorcising this negative shit right now, might as well add one more…
I haven’t felt real love or good, satisfying sex in over a decade.
I’m a very affectionate and sensual man, so living without
human warmth goes against my natural tendencies.

I remain positive, my dreams are as vivid as ever.
And I work toward them every day.
At one point, the winds will shift. It can’t rain forever.
It’s been monsoon season for way too long.

Sunshine, please grant me some of your rays.
Thank you for the light which has filled
my health and mind to this day.
Now I ask you to illuminate my finances.
Please allow me to shine and spread
the bounty all around me.

 
On July 11th, life smacked the fuck out of me.
I woke up that morning, and everything was in order.
In the afternoon it turned into violent emotional chaos.

A kind of pain that I have never felt before,
I’ve been lucky so far, and incredibly grateful for that.
On that day I experienced shock, desperation and
unbearable grief at a level I had never felt before.

It took me 12 days to recover and gather enough strength to pursue
my 90-day challenge. This post isn’t about the details of what happened
on that day, I’ve cried enough in the last two weeks.
I’m exhausted…

Today I want to zoom out, all the way into space.
Try to make sense of the bigger picture, and look for the
positive that might come out of this personal tragedy.

As I mentioned earlier, I’ve been blessed for most of my life.
And by that, I mean that my family has never suffered any real tragedies.
Like most families, we’ve experienced losses, but normal ones.
Older family members passing away of old age, family pets dying…
But no significant illnesses or accidental deaths, like many
other unfortunate people are forced to go through.

I feel lucky. The only “downside” is that when you reach your
forties having lived an emotionally painless life, when something
does happen, it has the power to demolish you. Being resilient and
bouncing back after unfortunate events is like anything else in life,
you get better and stronger with practice.
And without practice, life is great!
But you’re emotionally frail.

Pain makes you stronger.
It sucks but that’s the way it is.
Just like working out your muscles temporarily damages them,
causes them to be sore, and then rebuild even stronger than before,
our mental strength works in the same way.

The toughest and most successful people on earth are often the ones who have
endured unimaginable pain and setbacks in life. They refused to let those
things stop them and kept going through whatever hellish circumstances
was thrown in their path. They focused all their energy on a specific
goal and kept doing what they enjoyed the most.

When fucked up shit happens and you get knocked down, there are two choices;
Give up and let that thing destroy you, or…  Get back up, try to find the positive
in whatever happened and keep going forward.

If you get back up and keep fighting, you will notice that certain things won’t
phase you anymore. Specific fears you had, insecurities or what you considered obstacles, no longer have the power to stop you. Even if that’s the only positive that comes out of a tragedy or loss, this newfound power is enough to transform all aspects of your life.

After crying like a baby for a few days straight, when the grief settled,
I felt like a stronger version of myself. As if all the insignificant things that
bothered me before the tragedy lost their power over my emotional well-being.

All of us have heard of the hero who rises from the ashes and, against all odds,
went on to achieve the pinnacle of success in whatever field they practiced.
Actors, athletes, artists, businesspeople, etc.… Every profession, field, sport
or other types of activity have their own masters. And almost every
single one of those masters, at some point in their lives,
endured more pain than the rest of us.

Take Eminem for example.
He’s now the best emcee in the rap game.
Some people will obviously disagree, but if we only focus on the ability to create elaborate rhyme schemes in a way that’s never been done before, there’s
no denying that he’s untouchable.

He grew up poor, in a dysfunctional family.
Surrounded by drug abuse and violence.
He got his head bashed in a couple of times when he was in school,
was broke as shit, and his main passion in life- rapping-
was something that white boys weren’t known or respected for.
And for good reasons. His predecessors sucked.
(Beastie boys were cool but different. Not the same type of lyrical rhymes)
So there was no role model for him to follow.
He had to create his own path.

I remember being a teenager, and how emotionally vulnerable I felt
during that strange period in life. A time where you’re not a kid anymore.
So being cute is a thing of the past. Most teenagers are like weeds, they grow
fast and rarely look proportionate. On top of the odd physical changes going on,
there are floods of hormonal and mental changes going on as well.
People don’t treat you like an adorable child anymore, but they
don’t respect you as an adult either.
You’re stuck in limbo.

Eminem hung around with black kids, in a very rough neighbourhood,
and dreamed of becoming good at their craft. The only problem is that he
looked and expressed himself differently than they did.

In the underground rap world, everything revolves around respect.
And gaining respect in an art form that was created by minorities, to express
themselves against the oppression caused by white men, is not easy for a white boy.
When battled other rappers, he didn’t have one or two people rooting against him, he had hundreds of hardcore motherfuckers laughing at him and telling him to give up and go home.

Can you imagine how painful that must have been? I can.

I clearly remember how much it hurt to be laughed at by one cool kid,
or how a pimple could ruin my day and self-esteem. If I multiply the feeling
of shame by 1000, this is how he must have felt.

What a destructive force it must have been to deal with.
99.9999% of white kids, under those circumstances, would have given up.
But he persisted and held on to his dream.

When he got home, the lack of support continued.
No positive role models, no steady source of encouragement,
empowerment or love. This was an environment that would crush most kids.
But he didn’t give up, even though it would’ve been the most comfortable option.

Life has a unique way of rewarding persistent efforts against negative resistance,
It’s called success, recognition, mastery or anything else the resilient person is seeking.

Look at him now. He’s considered a rap god throughout the world.
Without all that adversity, he never would have mastered his
craft at the level that he did.

All those years of frustration and fighting to prove himself, all the pain and
deceptions he endured were essential to fueling his desire to reach his goal of
becoming the best who ever did it.

Eminem is not often portrayed as a positive influence.
Many of his tracks are considered violent,
rude or demeaning to some.

But anyone who listens carefully to his whole catalogue will
quickly realize that when he’s not fucking around or purposely saying things
to piss people off, he’s incredibly positive. Songs like “Not afraid,” “Lose yourself” or “Beautiful pain” are legendary in their capacity to uplift the human spirit. I’ve been listening to rap since I was 13 years old, and dozens of other musical genres.
I’ve found many of his tracks to be the most powerful for my spirit
when going through rough times.

There are hundreds of other examples of people who have gone through pure shit to eventually reach the stars and rule a specific area of life, but I chose him as an example because, in the media, he has always been portrayed as a negative force.
One doesn’t have to dig very deep to find out that despite a few violent
or negative lyrics, the man behind them is a positive soul.

On Wednesday, July 11^th at 3:30pm, I lost my boy.
A day that started like any other one,
but quickly became the most
painful day of my life.

Some people may say that my dog died on that day.
But it feels like I lost a child. A best friend.
A creature that brought balance into my life,
more happiness than I could ever wish for,
and showed me the true meaning
of unconditional love.

Joon was always by my side.
Sadly, now I’m the one who’s by his side,
typing this while sitting next to his final resting place-
a corner of my backyard that we devoted to him.

It still feels surreal…

He had the strength of an ox, but his love for everyone
and all creatures guided each of his actions. Two weeks ago,
he found a baby bird that had fallen out of its nest…
Quietly, he came to get and guide me toward his
discovery. He stayed very cool and pretended
that nothing was going on, he DID NOT
want Vik to know about this.

She was busy chewing her toy at the other end of
the yard. My boy was smart, he knew the bird
would be killed if Vik found out.
He made sure she didn’t.

I set up a ladder and placed the bird back in its nest.
It squeezed itself between its siblings, and soon the
mom came to feed them all.

Joon watched the entire rescue mission attentively.
My boy had saved the baby bird’s life!
He was such a gentle giant…
He brought infinite joy and happiness into my life,
every single day. His presence made each morning
a good one. The first thing I saw when opening my eyes
was his big, adorable and goofy face staring right at me.
Wagging his tail, hoping for his favourite
words: “You want breakfast?”

After his meal, he would sigh and whimper while I had coffee,
waiting for his 2nd favourite question: “We go for a walk?”.
Same scenario every evening at 7,
this time for supper and a walk.

As soon as I got up to feed him he would guide me toward
the kitchen, happily hopping all the way
down the hallway. Like a teenager who just
got a “yes” after asking a crush out on a date.

All that joy for a simple meal!

Joon taught me to appreciate and be grateful for the
simple things in life- Family, friends, health and love…

He got a kick out of making us laugh, especially when family or friends
would visit. He clumsily bounced around with his toy and
acted like a puppy, a big clown!

Like many adult ridgebacks, he was lazy.
All he needed was his morning and evening walks/runs,
the rest of his time was devoted to loving,
counter surfing and resting.

Juno’s favourite activity was “watching TV”, his ears perked up
and head tilted whenever we said those words.
For him- it just meant cuddling on the living room couch!

I miss him so much.
Now the house feels empty, couch feels cold
and waking up without him is painful.
Same thing for going to sleep
at night. I miss his loud, funny yawn.

I miss the noises he made while circling his bed 50 times before finding
a comfortable position. And finally- the long sigh, he was comfy.
Ready to sleep. Goodnight baby Joon.

Owning a dog is the saddest and happiest of life’s experiences.
You spend around a decade loving these amazing creatures.
They love you right back, exponentially. They show
you the real meaning of loyalty and unconditional love.
And one day, which always feels too close to the day they first
came into your life, you have to say goodbye.

These 9 years felt like weeks. I wasn’t ready to say goodbye.
Even though the pain becomes more tolerable with
each passing day, it still physically feels like
there’s a hole in my heart.

To ease the pain, all I can do is focus on the laughs,
happiness and great memories he brought to our lives.
And remind myself that we also gave him
the best life a dog could ever wish for.

Goodbye baby Joon. I miss you like crazy,
but will never forget you. You were a blessing.
You taught me to cherish and be grateful
for each day spent with loved ones.
And brutally reminded me that any
one of those could be the last…

Thank you, my boy.
I love you. Forever.

Juno
April 19^th 2009- July 11^th 2018

Ok, today<s gonna be a little different. No editing, no thinking. Just a constant stream of consciousness.
The goal in doing this 90 day challenge goes deeper than I can imagine.

I need to transform my life. And unless I do it drastically, it<S never gonna happen. Now I understand  what Jim Rohn meant when he said that you must change, if you want your life to change.
The words are pretty simple.

Finally, after hearing this precious truth for decades, it became a belief.
So I’m dedicating the next three months of my life to making big changes,
the kind of changes that can only end with new opportunities, ideas
and newfound skills. Maybe even an amazing, sweet-smelling
& sexy lady as a new friend…

The plan is simple;
Every single day:

• I’ll post a page on here to log my journey.
• I’ll post a new pic on insta, and video on youtube.
• Work toward first FBA product on sale by September/participate in all networking events.
• Make sure every workout is done with perfection, full mind body connection.
• Be proactive for everything from housecleaning to writing
• Do everything as well as it can be done, while balancing efficiency
• Push through resistance, one day at a time.
• Always do what needs to be done, especially if I don’t feel like it.
• Say yes to every invitation or opportunity that can somehow bring something positive into my life. No matter how socially uncomfortable or early in the day the event may be.
• Follow and complete level 2 spanish classes in Vaudreuil. Practice regularly.
• Be grateful for all the good things in my life. Health, family, pups, home, surroundings, wisdom, skills. Not to mention he rewards that will come my way, as long as I do these 11 things today.

Then I simply have to repeat the next day, and 88 more times after that.
If I stick to this simple formula, I will be a different person by the 90^th day.
I’ll still be me… Stripped of all the bad habits that have been holding me down for decades.
 

A better writer, marketer, Spanish speaker, one who can sell on amazon and
have access to powerful mentors. I’ll be even more physically fit, and my mind
will be 33 times stronger. It will now be used to pushing through resistance
as a natural habit and way of dealing with things.

My Vik n Joon accounts will each have 90 posts and many times more followers.
The blog will contain 90 pages of writing, most of it will probably be bad.
But there will definitely be diamonds hidden in there!!

I’ll be more confident, knowledgeable, marketable and sociable. I’ll be much
stronger, both physically and mentally.

The best part is that all of this is GUARANTEED to
be a result of following through for 90 days. And as amazing as it is,
it’s the worst thing that can happen!!!

What’s the best? Holy shit, sky’s the limit.
I could possibly meet an amazing life partner, a perfect fit, complements my life
and adds to the positivity and feelings of happiness and abundance.
Real love… Something I haven’t felt in so long.

Next, I could possibly get lucky and make 10k a month with my first Amazon
product. Realize that two of my videos have gone viral and get millions of views
and followers. Which would propel Vik n Joon to an insane level.

Once this magic happens, other successful people around me will detect this
winning attitude and offer new opportunities.

And then I would have this blog.
A story of success, about a story of success.

Detailed logs of my journey, the realest book ever written about
the process of becoming successful. The first detailed ramblings of
a man who knew success was near, and decided to share this story as
a way to practice his writing skills.

If I think even deeper about all this, it gets even more exciting.
Because when I complete this challenge and turn my life around
parts of this blog will now be a detailed record and proof that anything is possible.
Physical proof. Financial records, pictures computer files.
This will be the first time that a manifestation is deliberately planned,
executed, logged and accomplished. By an ordinary human being who could have looked at his life negatively, because on the outside this is ezactly what it looked like. But deep inside, he knew
that the hard work, self-relaizations and actions would bring an aabundance of well-deserved rewards.

This physical proof will become my first bestseller on kindle publishing.
The one you’re reading now.